Hot and Cold
I decided a while ago that he wouldn't be in my life as much as he used to for the sake of my sanity. So why did I cry when he told me he's leaving? That day is coming up quickly and I wish I could take back all of those words I said last year. He's broken my heart more times than I can count but then he goes and puts it back together. He's distant and then he's always there. He's hot then he's cold. He's up and he's down. And yes, I know I just quoted Katy Perry. That song is our relationship though. It's back and forth, good and bad, boring and exciting, predictable and completely surprising. He's the one I always run to no matter what. Lately though I've been thinking that maybe him leaving will be good for me. I've been trying to move on from him for how long now? Maybe four months without him will be good for my health (mental at least). No, I don't want him to leave but I kind of need him to leave. That might not make any sense to some people but it makes sense to me and that's all that matters. I guess it says something when you need a break from someone after only knowing them for two and a half years. Our friendship has been tumultuous but wonderful. I wouldn't change anything that happened between us because I learned so much from it. If we're truly meant to be together, like I've thought for so long now, it'll happen in time. And I know that if we're not, he'll always have a place in my heart. I'll never stop loving him.
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