Moving on?
It's been just over one week since you've left but somehow it seems so much longer. I've had a dream about you every night since that day. I don't want to dream about you because it hurts so much. Why are you popping up in my dreams all of a sudden? It just doesn't seem far. Are you dreaming about me too? Or am I the only one suffering this torture? I still have to survive 8 more weeks before I have even a chance of seeing you again so this whole dreaming about you every night thing has got to stop. It's just putting me in a bad mood and I don't want to see anyone because of it. It makes me want to be home with my family because they are the only ones who can make me feel better when I'm at my worst. The only bad thing about being home is knowing I won't be able to see you when I'm there. It's the strangest feeling to be going home today and having to remind myself that you're not there anymore. I've sent your first letter and I don't know if you'll reply. I hope you do because you told me you would before you left. I told Kerry that I would choose you any day and then I realized how pathetic I sound when I talk about you. I need to be stronger when it comes to you. I need to be strong without you. I need to find someone I don't want to compare to you because it seems like I've been doing that a lot lately. I know I shouldn't but I just can't help it. You're always been that one guy I run back to every time I get hurt. That needs to stop. I need to stop depending on you. . You've moved on with your life. I need to move on with mine. But how I do I do that? Where do I start?
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